okcupid

Mike says:
August 13, 2010 at 6:02 pm
I hear you. I really struck a nerve with this admission. Here’s the thing. I understand and believe that this information is of paramount importance to men. In that case, men should reflect their use of this statistic as a disqualifier by asking for it early on. In that case, there may be disappointment, but neither party is terribly invested yet.

You are probably right on the ethics/morality of asking this early, but tactically/strategically this is a mistake for the guy to make. The guy is trying to ascertain whether the girl is “fuckbuddy”/sex rotation material or LTR/marriage prospect. Rule #1 for a guy trying to have sex with a promiscuous girl quickly is to NOT give any indication whatsoever of being judgemental. Asking this question too early is the “tell” that you are in fact looking to judge her, and thus you disqualify yourself from getting sex. If the guy waits longer, he can get the sex and then try to figure out if she is in fact LTR material or not.

Not saying this is right but this is the game theory at play.

Mike says:
August 13, 2010 at 6:07 pm
@Susan,

Though the literature I cited here doesn’t state it specifically, I’ve wondered if part of the problem is that men cannot stand the thought of being with a woman who has more sexual experience than they do.